Your Choices, Successes, and Failures

Influences that shaped your life

By Arlene Harder, MA, MFT and John Fabian, Ph.D.


“Long afterwards, she was to remember that moment when her life changed its direction. It was not predestined: she had a choice. Or it seemed that she had. To accept or refuse. To take one turning down the crossroads to the future or another. But this would be hindsight, and time always mocked truth.”
— Evelyn Anthony, The Avenue of the Dead

“We can begin to take our failures non-seriously, it means we are ceasing to be afraid of them. It is of immense importance to learn to laugh at ourselves.”
— Katherine Mansfield, Journal of Katherine Mansfield

Topic Stimulators

  • What are the most critical choices you have made in your life?
  • What choices have you made that, at the time, you thought were going to turn out poorly, but ended with a positive outcome?
  • Do you do a lot of planning before embarking on a course of action or do you tend to act by the seat of your pants? Which style has helped the most?
  • What role has failure played in your life?